The Episcopal New Yorker Spring 2013 : Page 10

New Ways to Share Meeting People Where They’re At: Rhythms of Grace By the Rev. Lindsay Lunnum service involved telling each child, “You are treasured in the Kingdom of God.” I was delighted to learn that several days later one of the participants announced to her mother that she was “God’s treasure.” The message is getting through. A typical ROG service involves a short and simple telling of a Bible story (with lots of props), then the opportunity to engage with some of the concepts in the story in ways that appeal to a variety of learning styles. Our lesson for the March service was based on Mark’s account of Jesus calming the storm. Participants made their own tornadoes in a bottle, created a storm for toy boats in a plastic bin of water with vinegar and baking soda, made waves with shaving cream, and colored cardboard cutouts of Jesus calming the storm with the words from Psalm 46:10 written on the back: “Be still and know that I am God.” We re-gathered by making waves with a giant parachute while each child pretended to be Jesus and calmed the storm. By the time we marched (yes, we march!) from the parish hall into the church, everyone was calm and focused and ready to cele-brate the Eucharist on the floor in front of the altar. “It’s just like church!” one child loudly whispered. Yes, this is church. The Rev. Nora Smith, rector of the Church of St. Barnabas, described the Eucharist at a Rhythms of Grace service as “an immersion into the unexpected.” “Things happen, children move around, sounds are made,” Smith continued, “and they are all part of the delight of the service—not the distraction. Nothing goes ‘wrong’ in the liturgy, the right words are said in the right order by me but, beyond that, each holy meal is a new and surprising creation…and that seems exactly right.” But this isn’t just a story about a couple of parishes doing a new kind of ministry. And it is not simply about being welcoming and accommodating. This is also a story about the ways Rhythms of Grace can transform a parish. At first I balked at bringing ROG to St. Barnabas, because I feared I was the only one who wanted (or needed) to do it. I was surprised and humbled by 17 volunteers stepping up to help. I’ve never before needed to have a waiting-list for volunteers who are eager to participate! I knew how parents of special needs children long for their children to experience inclusion and acceptance. But what I did not anticipate was how rich the experience would be for the volunteers as they got to know the children on the children’s own terms. T ania Barrett-Moore had a mo-ment of connection with a young man on the autism spectrum, “There was a beautiful moment when he took my hand and gently smelled it, and I was grateful that he would feel comfortable doing this, and that I was shown this lovely way of getting to know an-other of God’s children.” As a result of Rhythms of Grace, there are parishes in this diocese where shaving cream, bubbles, and poster paint are as essential to the Liturgy of the Word as candles, lectors, and hymns. Hands are smelled, eye-contact is not expected, and surprising moments of connection happen in atypical ways, but we are discovering a different way to share an eternal message: we are loved by God and invited to grow in the knowledge and love of Christ Jesus. Lunnum is the assistant rector of the Church of St. Barnabas, Irvington. She is also the mother of two children, one of whom is autistic. Making waves with shaving cream at a Rhythms of Grace service. Photo: Shannon Johnson I s the shaving cream ready?” I asked the greeters who were standing by the door. “Let’s make sure we have some extra paper towels.” We recently added a third Sun-day worship service at the Church of St. Barnabas in Irvington, but instead of mak-ing sure the candles were lit and the lectors prepared, I check on things like our glit-ter supply and Handi Wipes. This is part of what it means to do Rhythms of Grace, a liturgy and faith-formation program for children with special needs and their families that was developed by two parishes in the Diocese of Connecticut. Combining story-telling, arts and crafts, therapeutic play, and a celebration of Holy Communion, Rhythms of Grace offers a new way to worship, strengthen skills, foster community, and be nour-ished at the Lord’s T able. Currently, there are two parishes in the Diocese of New York that offer this ministry: St. Barnabas, the parish where I serve as Assistant Rector, and St. Andrew’s in Walden. It is often nearly impossible for children and adults with special needs like autism to participate in a typical worship service, let alone Sunday School or Bible Study. For many families, this means that one parent goes to church while the other stays home. Or, more often, the family ends up skipping church altogether. I know firsthand how challenging church can be for families like mine. I first heard about Rhythms of Grace shortly after my son Seamus, 5, was diagnosed with autism. I really wanted to bring this ministry to my parish, St. Barnabas, but I wor-ried that doing so would only be self-serving, and I knew that I didn’t have the energy to do it on my own. So I prayed about it and asked God to send me people who would do this ministry with me, if this is what God intended. T wo weeks later, a couple from my parish called me. The Greiders wanted to discuss ideas that would help include their daughter, Sophie, in St. Barnabas’ ministries. Sophie, age 13, has significant developmen-tal delays. A month later, both of our families attended a Rhythms of Grace service in Avon, CT and we were so impressed that we knew we needed to bring this ministry to the Rivertowns. Rhythms of Grace is not about keeping “disruptive” kids out of our Sunday morning services. It is intended to honor and welcome families and people with autism or other social and intellectual challenges in ways that are uniquely meaningful to them. Jesus met people where they were at, and he taught that all who are welcomed in his name are es-sentially welcoming him. If a child needs to flap her hands, shriek, or walk the perime-ter of the room several times in order to feel comfortable, there is space for that. Rhythms of Grace provides a place where we hope that families feel they can freely be who they are without worrying about being disruptive. One of the games we played at our first 10 THE EPISCOPAL NEW YORKER Spring 2013 FOR MORE INFORMATION about Rhythms of Grace, visit their website: www.rhythms-of-grace.org St. Andrew’s, Walden, offers Rhythms of Grace on the 3rd Sunday of the month; (845) 778-5310; website: www.standrewswalden.com St. Barnabas, Irvington, will be offering ROG services on 4/7 and 5/19 at 4pm.; (914) 591-8194; www.stbarnabaschurch.org www.episcopalnewyorker.com

Beyond The Tramlines

The Rev. Lindsay Lunnum

Meeting People Where They’re At: Rhythms of Grace Is the shaving cream ready?” I asked the greeters who were standing by the door. “Let’s make sure we have some extra paper towels.” We recently added a third Sunday worship service at the Church of St. Barnabas in Irvington, but instead of making sure the candles were lit and the lectors prepared, I check on things like our glitter supply and Handi Wipes. This is part of what it means to do Rhythms of Grace, a liturgy and faith-formation program for children with special needs and their families that was developed by two parishes in the Diocese of Connecticut. Combining storytelling, arts and crafts, therapeutic play, and a celebration of Holy Communion, Rhythms of Grace offers a new way to worship, strengthen skills, foster community, and be nourished at the Lord’s Table. Currently, there are two parishes in the Diocese of New York that offer this ministry: St. Barnabas, the parish where I serve as Assistant Rector, and St. Andrew’s in Walden. It is often nearly impossible for children and adults with special needs like autism to participate in a typical worship service, let alone Sunday School or Bible Study. For many families, this means that one parent goes to church while the other stays home. Or, more often, the family ends up skipping church altogether. I know firsthand how challenging church can be for families like mine. I first heard about Rhythms of Grace shortly after my son Seamus, 5, was diagnosed with autism. I really wanted to bring this ministry to my parish, St. Barnabas, but I worried that doing so would only be self-serving, and I knew that I didn’t have the energy to do it on my own. So I prayed about it and asked God to send me people who would do this ministry with me, if this is what God intended. Two weeks later, a couple from my parish called me. The Greiders wanted to discuss ideas that would help include their daughter, Sophie, in St. Barnabas’ ministries. Sophie, age 13, has significant developmental delays. A month later, both of our families attended a Rhythms of Grace service in Avon, CT and we were so impressed that we knew we needed to bring this ministry to the Rivertowns. Rhythms of Grace is not about keeping “disruptive” kids out of our Sunday morning services. It is intended to honor and welcome families and people with autism or other social and intellectual challenges in ways that are uniquely meaningful to them. Jesus met people where they were at, and he taught that all who are welcomed in his name are essentially welcoming him. If a child needs to flap her hands, shriek, or walk the perimeter of the room several times in order to feel comfortable, there is space for that. Rhythms of Grace provides a place where we hope that families feel they can freely be who they are without worrying about being disruptive. One of the games we played at our first service involved telling each child, “You are treasured in the Kingdom of God.” I was delighted to learn that several days later one of the participants announced to her mother that she was “God’s treasure.” The message is getting through. A typical ROG service involves a short and simple telling of a Bible story (with lots of props), then the opportunity to engage with some of the concepts in the story in ways that appeal to a variety of learning styles. Our lesson for the March service was based on Mark’s account of Jesus calming the storm. Participants made their own tornadoes in a bottle, created a storm for toy boats in a plastic bin of water with vinegar and baking soda, made waves with shaving cream, and colored cardboard cutouts of Jesus calming the storm with the words from Psalm 46:10 written on the back: “Be still and know that I am God.” We re-gathered by making waves with a giant parachute while each child pretended to be Jesus and calmed the storm. By the time we marched (yes, we march!) From the parish hall into the church, everyone was calm and focused and ready to celebrate the Eucharist on the floor in front of the altar. “It’s just like church!” one child loudly whispered. Yes, this is church. The Rev. Nora Smith, rector of the Church of St. Barnabas, described the Eucharist at a Rhythms of Grace service as “an immersion into the unexpected.” “Things happen, children move around, sounds are made,” Smith continued, “and they are all part of the delight of the service—not the distraction. Nothing goes ‘wrong’ in the liturgy, the right words are said in the right order by me but, beyond that, each holy meal is a new and surprising creation…and that seems exactly right.” But this isn’t just a story about a couple of parishes doing a new kind of ministry. And it is not simply about being welcoming and accommodating. This is also a story about the ways Rhythms of Grace can transform a parish. At first I balked at bringing ROG to St. Barnabas, because I feared I was the only one who wanted (or needed) to do it. I was surprised and humbled by 17 volunteers stepping up to help. I’ve never before needed to have a waiting-list for volunteers who are eager to participate! I knew how parents of special needs children long for their children to experience inclusion and acceptance. But what I did not anticipate was how rich the experience would be for the volunteers as they got to know the children on the children’s own terms. Tania Barrett-Moore had a moment of connection with a young man on the autism spectrum, “There was a beautiful moment when he took my hand and gently smelled it, and I was grateful that he would feel comfortable doing this, and that I was shown this lovely way of getting to know another of God’s children.” As a result of Rhythms of Grace, there are parishes in this diocese where shaving cream, bubbles, and poster paint are as essential to the Liturgy of the Word as candles, lectors, and hymns. Hands are smelled, eye-contact is not expected, and surprising moments of connection happen in atypical ways, but we are discovering a different way to share an eternal message: we are loved by God and invited to grow in the knowledge and love of Christ Jesus. Lunnum is the assistant rector of the Church of St. Barnabas, Irvington. She is also the mother of two children, one of whom is autistic. FOR MORE INFORMATION about Rhythms of Grace, visit their website: www.rhythms-of-grace.org St. Andrew’s, Walden, offers Rhythms of Grace on the 3rd Sunday of the month; (845) 778-5310; website: www.standrewswalden.com St. Barnabas, Irvington, will be offering ROG services on 4/7 and 5/19 at 4pm.; (914) 591-8194; www.stbarnabaschurch.org

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